PHOEBE's <3

Saturday, April 07, 2007
i wan a gd get away... afterall i'm leaving the country soon....
how fast... not realli prepared.. guess i can nvr be realli prepared till the day cums... i hate my bad nose... they make me cant function properly... haiz... i'm not feeling v secured abt cambodia... so many uncertainties... so scared... but i feel i need to leave the country for a while... i'm so burdened... i deserve a gd break... at least i deserve a brand new life n a brand new being... sad to say tt growing up means tt not every thing can be restarted... like a new fresh piece of paper... i wanna stop thinking for a while n leave the country... at least i dun hav to face these issues for a mnth...
i dunno if i shld say this but my darling jie mei... i kept thinkin abt u though u're away... when will u stop inflicting these pain onto me... i'm getting so sick n tired of it... wad happened between us, wad am i supposed to do abt u?
haiz... forget it, i'm emo. tts it... i'd rather think more abt my craving for steamboat buffet, japanese buffet n a gd game of pool... i guess i kinda miss mel though... cant hang out wif her till she gets back from genting...
My god, i praise u for this time u knew i needed to be away... i pray for strength, support n directions of ur holy spirit as i struggle wif issues... i pray u'll guard my faith n lift my burden for i am weary lord. i pray against attacks from the devil as i fight this race wif ur strength... i pray u'll put thoughts, words n actions into me as i face situations... i pray u'll heal me of my pain... i pray for healing, peace n trust as i struggle to surrender my life... i ask for instructions as u purify my heart. I pray for u to provide n to protect when i'm away from the country as i trust u to see to things back here in s'pore... i pray against my pride n my worldly desires... let me luv u more than anything or anyone in this world... grant me obediance n courage as i remove anything tt cums inbetween me n Christ... Take my hand and then my life... to luv u more n more each day.... be abundance in ur luv n peace i pray and i trust to wad u hav promised... thank u father for wad i do not deserve...=)